If your suffering with mental illness you will know how nice it can feel as though you can escape as it’s not always that easy when it’s inside your head!

Well I have been able to escape in sunny Thailand while on holiday with my friend to celebrate her 30th. Not going to lie I didn’t think this was possible. I never thought I would be able to get myself to Manchester from Derby. Never mind get on 2 planes and have to fly for 15 hours which didn’t go to plan! But I will explain that on another post as that’s another story!

So I’ve just arrived back from my holiday and I have to say it was lovely to get away no day-to-day stresses getting me down… however, there was plenty of stresses involved with going away but they seem a bit of a distance memory now. I will explain more about those stresses as it could be a very long post. I will advise it is all about things that went wrong on the way this was due to the airline and the travel company though.

Being on holiday made me realise how lucky I am to be where I am. I have very good friends and family around me and I REALLY did miss them. Especially my dad.. (he is my rock). I was still able to enjoy myself even being so far away from home, which I didn’t really think was possible. I have been lucky enough to see some of the beautiful places which are around Phuket, Thailand (I will share photos in due course). I was able to see my favourite animal up close and feed it…. it was a dream of a lifetime. If you’re wondering it was feeding an elephant and it was incredible. One thing I will say is that if you are going away somewhere so far please ensure that you are prepared for the long journey. It was something which wasnt good for me… not being able to sleep at the best of times and then being 6 hours ahead really threw me off. The flight was difficult for me to sleep on but once I had arrived at the hotel I was able to get some quality sleep.

I would highly recommend anyone who is feeling a little trapped to escape especially those who are feeling low and a little inadequate. Make sure you have someone with you who will be there if you need someone to talk to… I would not recommend going away on your own as this can leave to a lot of thinking time (this can sometimes turn out bad). Even if you are just going somewhere near by to camp or just go for a nice relaxing weekend, I would say it is worth doing once every few months as it allows us to really think about what we want and what we have. Sometimes it allows us to see the good in our life, which isn’t possible for us to do alot of the time.

I have come back enjoying the little thing such as just sitting at home with my family, being able to sleep when I want and not be woken up by housekeeping. Having dinner and a cuppa with my dad… I have missed just having the morning chats with friends and family. Missed listening to the radio… we never seemed to have this on holiday strange I know. I have missed the feeling of carpet on my toes, I am very strange I know. But all these little things have made me realise how lucky I am, don’t get me wrong I am still no prefect and still having to deal with my issues. I am slowly getting there but going on holiday has allowed me to really appreciate more things than I could.

What do you appreciate when you’ve been away from home for a while?

Speak Soon


From me to all of you….

Get dressed, love.You’re going to be late.

You look at yourself in the mirror,

The one you really hate.
Put it down, love.

It’s caused you so much pain.

You’re going to do damage.

You don’t want to be called insane.
Stand up, love.

Your tears make you weak.

Wipe off that black mascara,

Proof of sadness upon your cheek.
Take your pills, love.

You must try your very best.

Forget about your dizzy spells,

The tightening in your chest.
Chin up, love.

No one can know your thoughts.

You must act like you’re happy

While your heart just sits and rots.
Smile a little, love.

Let me see those pearly whites.

No one has to know

What you thought about all those nights.
Breathe for me, love.

Your pain won’t be forever.

Take my hand, and I’ll take yours.

We’ll get through this together.