Month: May 2017

Escape Rooms

- Vanessa Leave a comment

So I thought this would be an interesting one to share with you. Work decided as a team building exercise we would go to the escape rooms in Nottingham and I for some reason decided to accept the offer to go. Not sure this was the best idea.

I am someone who suffers with severe anxiety and as a result controls a lot of what I do… this can be anything from wearing what I want or going out with the girls. So being locked up within a room and having to work my way out of it is not something I find ‘fun’  but I thought I would give it a shot. At least I wasn’t in the room on my own, I had a good few members of my team to help me work through the challenges. I can’t imagine my mind being the best with the anxiety juices flowing.

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So anyways a night out had been planned with the work colleagues for a little bit of team building and I felt so anxious at work leading up to the night that I ended up having to go home and have a nap as I was in a right state… crying, shaking, not thinking straight etc! When I say nap it ended up being 4 and half hours… for someone who doesn’t normally sleep this was like a gift! So my friend was lovely enough to pick me up as I knew I wouldn’t be able to drive to Nottingham, just the thought of it my heart starts to race!

On the way I wasn’t too bad, I just felt a little sick which I could handle. Before I know it I was standing in the escape rooms front desk asking for water to ensure I took my tablets as I could feel the anxiety kicking in! I thought oh no what have I signed up to? Thinking I can’t even run because I haven’t drove and we are all in groups so I would be letting the team down. So I decided to take my tablets and just give it ago. So the lovely lady walked us to our room to explain all the normal health and safety information and what our room was all about… setting the scene! I didn’t take any of this in… apart from no licking wires which I don’t think I will ever forget! Next thing I know we are locked in a room with a van and ‘clues’. What’s a clue I had no idea. I just remember thinking I need to look for keys!

As soon as it started and the vault opened, all the anxiety was pushed to a side as I was able to be in control of the situation… either that or the tablets had kicked in! (I am not recommending that everyone takes tablets to get rid of anxiety, you will be advised by your doctors if you need these). I enjoyed everyone moment and is the best thing I have done in such a long time.

So back to the room… you have an hour to escape and have to work together to find clues and find al the information you need. We did very well for saying we had the 2nd hardest room there. We was able to get through the vault and use all the tools we had to get us through each step. We was even ahead at some times… one of my friends/colleagues had figured out one of the puzzles without the clue! Amazing I know. I wouldn’t have been able to it.

You can do whatever you set your mind to!

I can hear you all asking… so did you escape? The answer was no but we was very close towards the end we wasn’t in best form being all hot and sweaty and starting to get a little irritable. Maybe another 5 minutes and we would have been out.

But it made me realise that even when my anxiety is telling me to run for the hills, I need to try to push through these feelings. This goes to you all too, I really had such a good night and couldn’t have wished for a better evening and will for sure be doing it again! No one or nothing is stopping me from now. I will be going for the hardest room next time though… or maybe just try and complete the room I tried to do!

If you have any escape rooms near you I would recommend it highly for those who are wanting a good night out, a team building excercise etc. I know for a fact our team will be heading back out at some point to give it another go! I honestly had the best time, I laughed, I did get a little frustrated and not going to lie the anxiety was there for 10/15 minutes here and there but I could handle it. That is something I haven’t been able to do for such a long time and I can’t thank my colleagues enough for this, I felt human again for an hour!

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What have you done where you have had to battle your anxiety?

Speak soon

Vx

*All photos are mine

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Collateral Beauty

- Vanessa Leave a comment

U5dtygKaQGsXpRydLsoBdAM9oMf9BPR_1680x8400I don’t know if you have already heard of this film as it did come out in the cinema’s last year. As soon as I saw the trailer it was something I knew I had to watch.. I will explain a short while why. Will Smith is the main character who loses his little girl and he writes letters to death, love and time.

So before I go into details about the film I little bit more I will explain why I wanted to watch this. This isn’t so easy for me to write, even the thought of it I am fighting back the tears! So here it goes… I lost my mum when I was very young and never have been to accept this, after seeing many different specialists it came to the conclusion that I have never grieved for my mum. This film seemed right up my alley as it speaks about how death, love and time have an impact on everyones live. Will Smith’s character starts to resent them as a result of the loss of his daughter.

So he writes letters to these ‘things’ to explain why he is so upset and angry. The one that got me the most was love, as he made it very obvious that he doesn’t see any love in his life after his daughter was taken. Love explains that even in the pain she is still there and I didn’t really get this but after much thinking it came to me, that no matter how hurt or sad you are it is due to the passion inside you. You must of really loved something /someone in order for it to cause you so much pain.

Love is everywhere and we can’t escape this. I think this is something that we can all take when it comes to our mental health. No matter how much we are hurting it’t there due to the love inside us for something or someone. I think we need to remember this in the times of need, remember those loved ones we could be hurting as a result of harming ourselves.

This is a film I would highly recommend to most people, especially those who have lost loved ones and haven’t really even been able to understand why this happens to them. However, it might not be the best of ideas if this is still fresh… when I say fresh I mean within the last couple of months. But if you do decide then don’t forget the tissues.

I can hear you all now.. whats does Collateral Beauty mean?

The meaning is simple, the damage of a child’s death is so dark and severe that a parent cannot see the full picture because of the tragedy. It may take a lifetime to understand that within that dark and ugly place there was a beauty and love there so strong that not even death could dishevel it ….that in fact, the beauty is that love continues even after and through death and the impact of that trauma brings us closer to the love that we shared for that person and all the ways love of that individual has affected our lives and the lives of others. The secondary beauty that has an everlasting ripple effect on other peoples lives and through eternity is what living is truly about. All about the quality and not so much the quantity. Life is a teacher and Love is the reward in all its forms. When we can see love where darkness used to reside we can finally turn our lives and those around us into something glorious.

So I do think this is something we can all take away… maybe some of us haven’t lost a child but it still applies to those who have lost any loved ones.

Speak Soon


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